Parent Resources

Most individuals, including children, tend to develop a preference for one kind of learning style over another. The vast majority of children respond better to the visual path of teaching. The second most preferred medium of instruction is auditory. People usually use a combination of visual and auditory modes to impart education. However, it is necessary to recognise what kind of learning inclination or style does the child have which in turn is a direct reflection of his way of thinking. Your Child has Learning Difficulties? Difficulties usually arise when a child’s preferred educational mode of instruction gets blocked. For example, a child may be suffering from visual problems like focusing on what is being instructed or he has problems in the eye-brain pathway. Again, a child who depends heavily on hearing something to be interested in it may be suffering from some kind of an auditory problem. It is advisable to make sure that the child isn’t facing any of such issues. Verbal or Visual Learning? Children could also have a learning style that could be mainly described as being verbal which means that they have a thought processes that takes place in the verbal domain or they could have a principally visual mode of learning which means that their thought processes mainly functions in the pictorial representation format. Those with a verbal style of learning tend to react better to lesson being read out aloud in the classroom. Those with a more visual mode will react better to detailed illustrations and drawings that accompany text. Such students are much better at observations and drawing inferences. A visual learner is a student who learns much better well from a stimulus presented to him, invariably a stimulus which can be seen, not just instructed or ‘told’ to him. This kind of a student learns more by looking around and observing his surroundings. Individual Preferences There are other factors which contribute to a complete assessment of an individual’s preferred style of learning. Such factors are the actual, conscious and voluntary choices of a student or any learner. Some children may prefer the independent way of studying, i.e. without the company of some friends or classmates while some vs. are dependent learners, i.e. when asked to study alone they tend to get anxious by the mere feeling of being alone in a study room. Buzz up!

Reading aloud to children is the most fundamental aspect of nurturing a young, growing reader. Reading aloud is very beneficial for children, especially the really young ones. By listening to stories, a sense of curiosity regarding reading and books is created within them. A child whose home environment includes listening to well-read, animated stories is likely to develop an affinity for creativity, reading and in general for books. Where to Read? Try and locate natural and interesting reading spots like under a tree or at a nearby park. Inside the home, try and read to the child before bedtime. In the child’s room by spreading a soft cushion on the floor. In the backseat of the parked family car. When to Read? Start as early as possible. Reading aloud helps to quieten a weeping baby and to entertain a gloomy one. Continue to read aloud even after the child has learnt to read himself. There are always words and parts of the text he won’t be able to comprehend and there the parent’s involvement again becomes very important. Special time should be set aside, every day, to read out for the children. This could be just before naptime or at bedtime. During times of family visits, for example at a family breakfast, at the grandparent’s place. During daily household chores. The child could be asked to read when the parents are cleaning the dishes. The child could be asked to read from the morning newspaper, while the parents are having their breakfast. A child\’s reactions have to be judged. Children getting restless when being read to, mean they are losing interest. Try and evaluate if the settings of the reading place are affecting his interest levels. What to Read? There is a wide choice available to a parent. Special children books are available. Other sources include magazines and newspapers. Parents could also include on-the-spot reading like that of road signs, menus and catalogues and billboards. There are many rhymes and songs especially meant for children. Children love to hear and swing to rhythmic poems and even jingles. Young children also enjoy picture books accompanied with stories and colourful illustrations. Parents have a wide range of selections and it is necessary to keep introducing new themes and characters to keep the young readers engrossed. Newspapers also offer a lot of stuff that can be used for slightly elder children. These include choosing articles with smaller sentences. Being flexible is necessary. If the child doesn\’t enjoy the book being read, it makes sense for the parent not to be stubborn and try some new reading material.

A home library doesn’t need to be very elaborate or costly to impress upon a child. Fancy and expensive books needn’t necessarily be the only way to capture a child’s imagination. A family should have the suitable reading material, presented in the right manner so that approaching the library and reading becomes easier for the child. Setting up a Library It is not the size of a home library but its location and appearance that is more significant. Simply, a corner of a room with lots of bookshelves, some comfortable seated furniture and good artificial and natural lighting are the prime requisites. Size of the Library The size would vary according to the number of books which are stored or placed in the library. The special interest and fondness of each family member should be taken care of and the library should be arranged in such a way that there is enough space for books pertaining to each kind of liking expressed by the family members. For children, books should be stocked in terms of present and further reading material and the library should be big enough to comfortably choose and browse through the books they are fond of. Display of the Library There is a wide range of objects which can be manipulated or used to build up a family library. These include new or used bookcases with some built-in shelves and even open magazine racks. These provide an easy-to-approach display for the books which is essential to attract a child. The reading material for children should be placed on the lowest of shelves. Children books should be grouped together and some other interesting reference books should be placed next to them, just to fire the curiosity of the child. Making Small Family Libraries Other common things that can be used to create a rather small family library include, • Cinder-block Bookshelves — cinder blocks, small decorated bricks or particle-board shelves can be found at any hardware store. These blocks can be arranged on top of each other and then a shelf can be placed on them, giving it a bookshelf-like appearance. • Crate Bookcases— these are perfect for stacking children’s books. Plastic crates are available in varying sizes in most departmental stores. The child can be asked to paint and decorate the crate. These make very durable, cheap and easy-to-maintain bookshelves.

Human development is a continuous process and begins very early in the human life. Every individual, from the time of birth, undergoes physical, behavioural and emotional changes. Similarly, children in the age group of four-to-five, have specific developmental changes and any deviation from them should be checked out with the family doctor. Recognising Physical Development in Children For children in the age group of four-to-five there are some normal physical developmental characteristics that a parent needs to know. • Children in this age group grow at a slower rate than infants and toddlers. Usually their body organs grow faster than the body. This usually gives the preschoolers a rounded-tummy appearance. • Their height should at least 50 percent of their adult height and the body weight should be 20 percent of the adult body weight by the age of five. • Most children at this age develop their motor skills and can skip, run and climb. • Most of trained preschoolers are able to tie their shoelaces, buttons and draw rough but recognizable figures. • Have an increased lung capacity and develop the tendency to breathe more deeply. • Most of these children have lost or are in the process of losing their ‘baby look’ as the limbs grow longer. • Children of this age group will look about the same size — regardless of the gender. • There is a remarkable increase in the overall physical condition and some resistance to germs and repeated infections is also present. However, such developing immunity is very subjective among preschoolers and may vary with each of them. Cognitive Development in Children Aged 4 to 5 • They interrelate with and learn more about their surroundings much better through playful activities rather than being taught or instructed. • They start to realise their home and family members through exploration and inquisitiveness. • Begin to show signs of more affection for a particular family member or a caregiver. • Start to follow and understand basic rules — the first signs of accepting authority. • Understand and start of follow regular activities like brushing their teeth and washing hands. Emotional Development in Children Aged 4 to 5 • They do rely on caregivers but don’t need constant physical contact like toddlers. • They continue to express emotions and begin to return hugs, kisses and respond very physically to people. • Begin to develop affinity for certain children of their age group — a precursor of their tendency to start recognising preferences and developing relationships. • Learn to recognize foods that don’t taste good and start to associate with smells of foods they don\’t like.

Transition Time for Preschoolers and Elementary Students Children progress through many grades during their school days and they face many challenges. Changing academic demands make some students very jittery and they find it difficult to deal with the emotional changes. Educators have identified certain transition points in a child’s school life which are predominantly demanding and the children usually need emotional support when faced with these challenges — physical, emotional, social and academic. Preschool, elementary and upper elementary are the very first of the transitions that a child is faced with. Preschool Transition Physical/Emotional Challenges — for most children, preschool is an introduction to conducting themselves without the presence of their parents. Children begin to realise the very concept of discipline and manners. Social Challenges — toddlers at a preschool have to conduct their activities together and develop friendships with each other. Academic Challenges — preschoolers develop listening, basic reading and recalling skills and paying attention. Early Elementary Transition Physical/Emotional Challenges — transition to a grade school means attending bigger classrooms and longer school days, i.e. extended separation from parents and the usual caregivers. The students have to adjust to the concept of daily time tables and a routine life. Completion of assignments becomes essential. Social Challenges — children form much more comprehensive friendships as compared to preschool and develop their first set of ‘best’ friends. Academic Challenges — children are introduced to basic reading and mathematical calculations. They learn how to read and make an effort to understand the meaning of words. They begin to identify with the characters in stories. Upper Elementary School Physical/Emotional Challenges — in the elementary grades, more independence is handed over to the children. Different personalities of the students begin to emerge and their different aptitudes are more apparent. Social Challenges — children try and expand friendships and begin to work in cooperation with each other and tend to get more comfortable in once particular kind of social circle. Academic Challenges — the mere acquisition of basic skills becomes redundant. Now, children are expected to be able to use basic skills to acquire information and solve problems, to be competent in reading comprehension and writing skills.

Letting the Child Know About the Importance of Homework If a child is watching TV beyond the regular, stipulated hours – tell him so and discourage the child to do such an act again. Make sure that the child is not making casual telephone calls during the homework time. But a call to a classmate about an assignment should be acceptable. Children need to realise that the family members too agree with the importance of completing assignments. If the family has to occasionally let go of an outing or a visit to the mall to accommodate homework time, they should do so. This reminds the child of the small sacrifices the family is making for his education. Setting up a Schedule The child should be used to a regular time to complete his homework. This helps a child to finish assignments in time and still have enough time to play. A good study schedule should work for the child and the family. A schedule that works well in one family unit may not work in another. Making the child complete the homework just before bedtime is always a bad idea. This decreases the probability of the child recognizing its importance. Other activities including playing a sport or getting music lessons too should be flexible with respect to the homework schedule. If sometimes there isn’t enough time to finish assignments, the child shouldn’t mind cancelling out one of the outside activities. Creating the Right Environment One of the most important requirements for studying at home is the right place to study. Make sure that the study area isn’t too fanciful. Placing a simple desk and chair in a quiet place is usually good enough. The place should be well lit, preferably with a good amount of natural light and ventilation and should be away from distractions like television or music. Removing Distractions Some children tend to study better with quiet surroundings. This should not be associated with a weak concentration level. Similarly, some children react better to learning with the music being played. Again, this shouldn’t be treated as being stubborn or being distracted. These tendencies are in-built and shouldn’t be argued with or squashed just because they may seem unreasonable to a parent. Getting the Child Involved Simple resources like a pencil, pen, paper and supplies of glue and scissors should be kept handy. Try and shop for such goods with the child. The child begins to associate the importance of homework and the ‘fun’ quotient of doing schoolwork is increased when he shops for his favourite geometry set or the latest brand of coloured pencils.

Getting a child to love reading or helping reluctant young readers is a challenge faced by most parents. Kids do learn reading skills at school but developing reading as a habit and associating pleasure with reading is best inculcated in children by the parents. Get them Started One of the easiest and the most effective way to encourage children to start reading is by getting them interested in what the book holds. This is best done by reading aloud their favourite poems or the latest comic books. Once a child gets hooked on to a few characters, his own curiosity would take care of him getting genuinely interested in reading. For this, the parents need to start off early. Even a toddler can see pictures and react to them if the parent is holding the book and helps the child associate each picture with a sound or an exaggerated expression. This kind of reading time should be planned without the distraction of a TV or the mobile phones ringing. Once a child develops a particular interest, ask him to read a few pages to you. This helps to develop the child’s confidence and elocution and public speech talents. Further, the parents can act as the audience and make sure that the child reads and pronounces the words correctly. A Reading Stimulus Simple tricks like always having books and magazines around the house is a good way to make the child realise that books are an essential and commonly-found article in the house. Sooner or later, the child is bound to be fascinated by some particular theme or characters in some magazine or book. It is a smart idea to start a small, well-kept home library for children where then can sit and read and even borrow books for their friends. Allowing little children to touch or smell and even hold books can make them feel associated with books. For this purpose, parents should think about getting durable books and pick paperbacks or plastic-covered books for smaller kids. When reading out aloud, choose books that the child prefers. There numerous children\’s books and selecting the best among them is a formidable task. It is better to take the children to book fairs or bookshops and let them make a choice for themselves. However, if the children are of school-going age, they should be encouraged to visit the school library. Parents should talk to them about the purpose of a library and encourage children to get books issued from their school library.

The most recent parenting trend, at least in the urban centres is opting to have just one child. Thus, more urban children are becoming the only child. The second child is often not wanted in preference to have better careers or the reluctance of women to undergo motherhood twice or financial limitations. Some people actually believe that a single child has a much higher chance of being successful in life as he would be getting the undivided attention of his parents and the maximum parental and family support. The Challenge However, contrary to the common belief that bringing up the only child or the sole child has many challenges and parenting issues related to it. Besides the obvious problem of keeping the sole child busy in a nuclear family set-up, there are many other issues too. • Problem — a single child is becomes the centre of all the parental attention and hence the family expectations from the child are usually high. There is a tremendous pressure on the sole child to be very successful in school and in life. Solution — the parents should learn to tone down their expectations and be more realistic in their approach towards the child. The very thinking that they have made a huge sacrifice by having just one child is rather regressive. Single-child parenting is a choice that the parents make themselves. • Problem — there is always the possibility of the only child being pampered by the parents. This pampering or overindulgence sometimes spreads over to the grandparents also. This childhood indulgence could make the child develop serious adjustment problems in a social circle. Solution — the parents have to fight their temptation to overindulge the child and make sure that the child develops social adaptability rather than feeling like the ‘king’ of his domain, i.e. his home and the parent’s undivided attention. • Problem — the single child doesn’t have a sibling at home to bond with. Thus, the child tends to develop a very strong and sometimes obsessive bond with the parents and this turns into over-dependence for everything including homework and entertainment. Solution — the parents have to create opportunities for the child to interact with children in his age group. This could be achieved by taking the child to public parks and other play areas where the chances of the child’s social interaction with other kids in enhanced. Parents should try and increase their social interaction with their relatives and cousins and encourage the child to share more of his personal things including toys with others.

Issues like a child’s speech delay or developing temper-related mannerisms are often discussed at parent-teacher meetings besides the obvious subject of the child’s classroom performance. These are many advantages for a caregiver and a parent to attend a parent-teacher conference. An insight into the psychology of the parents and the ability to evaluate the kind of atmosphere they are providing to the child at home, is of vital importance to a teacher. Parents too need to look beyond their child’s academic performance and should seek an honest opinion regarding his shortcomings. Understanding the Parent Perspective It becomes vitally important that an open line of communication and responsive relationship is established between the parents and teachers who are attending such a conference. In order to do this, the parents and teachers need to stay in touch via informal conversations over a period of time. During the meet, it is crucial for the teachers and caregivers to be sensitive to the fact that most parents may have a thought process. The caregiver needs to ensure that they establish an open dialogue with the parents with the welfare of the child as its main theme. Even if the teacher has some serious issues with the child, it is imperative to establish a positive tone for the conference before embarking upon the discussion regarding the weaknesses of the child. Holding a Parent-teacher Meeting The teacher should try and arrange the parent-teacher meet at a convenient timing and should begin the meeting with some positive anecdotes about the child. The teacher should try and focus more on the abilities and competencies of the child before discussing his inadequacies. The teacher should try and encourage the parent’s side of the discussion and their inputs. These contributions by the parents provide valuable insight in evaluating the child’s home environment and the kind of parent support he has. Tackling the Problem If the teacher has a grievance or a specific concern regarding the child’s performance, he should work out a methodology that involves the parents. An involved parent is a key component in sorting out the problems that a child faces. It is important to remember that the child’s upbringing combines a classroom and his home. The emphasis should be on planning a cooperative action plan with an honest follow-up. As the meeting reaches its conclusion, the parents should be encouraged to approach with any further questions or concerns that they might have.

Parental involvement is one of the most crucial parts of a child\’s complete education. Parents should try and use a combination of a few simple measures to ensure that they aren’t compromising on a chance of improving their child’s focus, behaviour and overall performance. Attending PTAs PTA meetings are crucial and should be attended by parents, no matter how busy their life’s schedule is. Usually, the parents complain about the lack of time or interest after a hard day at the office but showing up a school meeting and school events is ample proof for the child that his welfare and education is of top priority for his parents. Parents have the liberty to be either: • Be a new-age PTA parent and participate online OR • Be an old-fashioned PTA parent and be actually present Staying Connected Parents should use easily-accessible tools like e-mail to stay in touch with the child\’s school authorities. Besides the often-circulated printed newsletters, schools have websites that help to keep the parents informed about the latest developments at school. In some schools, the teachers even distribute their personal e-mail IDs among the classmates for their parents to freely communicate and stay connected. Get Involved One easy way of easily finding out about the child\’s performance at school is by having an honest conversation with his teacher and parents of the classmates. Parents should find ways of contributing to school events. Simple contributions like writing an article for the school newsletter or making goodies for school celebrations shows to the other PTA members that the parents are serious about making a difference to the quality of education being imparted at the school. Getting support and sympathy of the PTA assures that the child is looked after and cared for. Helping Each Other Out Parents should try and stay connected with the other parents. Parenting isn\’t easy for anyone but talking it out with other concerned parents can help out to sort out issues which one set of parents haven’t been able to do so on their own. There is a huge probability that the other parent might have some experiences and hence, insight by having had been through a similar problems with their children. Parents could try and set up a parent help group which could be either in the residential block or even at the office. Children who have involved and caring parents, exhibit: • Higher grades better test scores. • Improved school attendance and low anxiety. • Motivation and increased sense of self-esteem. • Lower rates of absenteeism or suspension. • Reduced instances of violent behaviour.