Parent Resources

Media and Our Children. It is believed that media literacy is very crucial for today’s children. It makes the difference between kids being a tool of media or the media being used as a tool by the children. These days young children demand technologically-controlled toys and being online is regarded as a normal part of growing up. Why Media-related Guidance? The media arts tools are easily accessible and having the entertainment world at their fingertips is an exciting prospect for every child. This is where adult guidance becomes very important. The parents have to make sure that the children use technology as it end-users and don’t become emotionally dependent on them. Media tools should be used to encourage a child’s creativity and not replace it. It is the responsibility of the parents and teachers to guide children through the use of various media tools. Preschoolers and Kindergartners Kids of this age are easy prey to accepting everything that is on the television as the reality. The parent’s role becomes critical here. For example, the parents have to explain that television commercials using extreme special effects aren’t the reality but just a fanciful creation. Elementary Students These children have some degree of developed analytical skills and are capable of grasping the basic concepts of the images seen on the television and computer. However, children this age might take a particular fancy to certain characters and start developing a virtual world of such friends. Again, the parents have to be careful that children don’t get obsessive about their favourite characters and don’t confuse reality with TV viewing. Engaging Students in Media The parents shouldn’t be afraid of encouraging a child to enjoy the media in its various forms. However, the parents have to ensure that these activities are suitable for the child’s age. Parents can do this by slowly exposing the children to the world of media. • Media in Everyday Life — using media is a part of our daily lives. Even a young child should be encouraged to see how technology has made his/her toys so amazing. • Active Involvement — preschoolers love to sing and dance with music from TV or a radio. Try and focus the child’s attention towards the number of channels a TV can play. Try and tell the child about the incredible use of a TV remote. • Voice Recording — a very comfortable activity to introduce children to the media is to tape record the child’s voice as he recites a poem or a song. Then replay the tape. Children are fascinated upon hearing their own voice and want to find out how it the recording process actually works. • Birthday Celebrations — parents could plan a special birthday party for their child and select the theme as ‘Be a Star’. A small gathering of the child’s friends can be invited. Ask the children to sing one-by-one. The children should be encouraged to sing independently. A small level of lighting controls and effects could be created on the podium where the children sing. The children would be curious about how a small theatre-like setting could be created in their own house. • Outside Influences — children could be taken to aquariums and zoos. This helps the children related with the images of animals seen on TV. • Photographing — a digital camera can be used to a great extent in making the children curious about how things work and how do natural settings look when they are clicked or presented as pictures.

Parents send their children off to school and expect the teachers and the school to take care of their child’s educational needs. However, parents themselves can play a vital role in ensuring that their children’s education is holistic and effective. Parent participation and involvement at home, and to a certain extent in school, has a major impact on the child’s focus and performance. Parent can be Effective at Home by: * Reading to the child – reading aloud is considered the most effective way to develop a child’s aptitude to read, write, think and be creative. * Discussing about the characters in the books and stories the child likes the most. * Helping the child in organizing his daily schedule. * Limiting the quality and quantity of television viewing, especially on school nights. * Talking to the child about the daily happenings in his school. * Making sure that the child completes his homework before going to bed. Parents can be Involved in the School by: * Meeting with a teacher at PTA and maintaining communication with the school staff members to determine the extent of the parent involvement needed. It is essential that parents do volunteer some time for the school activities. They could do so by: * Becoming a student helper and help in organising classroom activities. * Tutoring or reading out to or with the other children. * Assisting and helping the coaches at sporting events. * Helping out the school in holding arts and crafts workshops. * Assisting with a school club or a drama group. * Speaking to the students about professional subjects. * Helping the class in writing small news articles. * Working as a library assistant for a few hours, every month. * Assisting children with special needs. * Helping out in preparation of computer and science projects. * Planning out and helping in raising money for various school clubs. * Accompanying or helping to arrange various field trips for the children. Children of Involved Parents: * Are less frequently absent and don’t skip school. * Are better behaved and are socially more active. * Perform better academically. * Develop better levels of self-confidence. * Have lesser stress-related or anxiety issues.

Children are much vulnerable to fear as threats, risks and dangers are close at hand. Ask the mother of Taniya (24 months) and she would sadly announce that her child came to know about some ghost story and from that day sleeps with lights switched on. Small children are immature and their understanding of things is raw. They tend to believe whatever they are told and worse than that they add to their own worries by imagining a lot that is impractical. “Children live in an imaginary world, which over the time is replaced by the real world,” says Pooja, who works as a childcare specialist. “Coupled with this fact that the kids have a natural tendency to exaggerate things, it becomes a real problem sometimes to convince the child as what is possible and assure the safety.” Children also derive very simple meanings from their perceptions – whatever they see and whatever they hear. It is either fun or the thing to refrain from. Kids like cartoons because the characters are often funny, yet meaningful to them. After watching a Spiderman show on television, young Aryan actually believes that Spiderman exists and that he can cast a web or swings high on a rope. The toddlers are more scared when someone narrates a horrified version of a telltale or similar story. They may also see or experience a normal event as distorted and reatening. For example a ball hanging in the basket may appear in the poor light as an unusual figure or form. Children may also carry fears about other people, some objects or animals. How Can Mommy Help? Our experts are of the opinion that parents must try not to expose their children to material and content that involves violence, supernatural phenomena, etc. The parents must also refrain from narrating their children ghost stories or any such tales. The mind of a child is very sensitive and it can just hang on to any idea. The mother of the toddler, as the child trusts the mother most, has to assure and convince the child that its safety is taken care of and that the kid must not be afraid of telltales or carry fear of other children or people. Further, the parents must ensure that they get to the root of the problem. A lot of explaining needs to be done and the parents should ensure that they are available and know how to deal with it.

Pampered Child: When to Say “No” to your Child Even before a child is born, the parents are too eager to shower their love and care on the arriving guest. With the newborn in the family, a whole set of transitions takes place. It can be better described as one of the important phases in the lifecycle of a human being. The father and the mother, together they have to provide the child with all they can. As the baby grows, it starts demanding. Children are very intelligent and respond quickly. They learn easily and when it is time to twist then know which way to do it. A child hardly understands the difference between wants, desires and needs. He might ask for Santa Claus, the cycle the kid in the neighbourhood has, new toys and what not. Mrs. Priya says that her youngest kid wants all that the elder ones get and she has a hard time negotiating with the kid. That is one point where some children get spoilt as their parents fail to realize what is needed by the child. When To Say No? “Believe me, it is so awful and strange as my daughter begins to sob, when I say ‘No’ and she does not understand,” says Amrita. “I am myself confused at times as whether her demand is really needed or not.” A child enjoys pampering the most. The baby just feels like giving orders, which should be obeyed and fulfilled by the subjects. Parents also like to pamper their children, but limits have to be drawn. A pampered child might get used to wishes and whims that are easily fulfilled by the parents and other family members. ‘Negotiate and negotiate hard’, that is the best advice you can have on parenting. The child must, even if it appears unacceptable to the child, learn to ask only those things which parents do allow. If the parent says no, then no it means. After negotiations, if the child continues to insist then the parent has to say no and close the chapter as soon as possible. Even a little leniency can make the child feel that it is possible provided he or she keeps insisting. It becomes a habit and then starts affecting the behaviour. Other Methods One parent who has written to us from Pune says that she often negotiates by providing alternates. The child asks for a mobile phone and we settle on comic books. That way the child also gets something worth to have and the parent also manages to grant the wish of the child.

Examination-related Anxiety Anxiety, during examination time, among children of all ages is virtually universal. Except for the very innocent preschoolers, most school students tend to suffer from this problem. However, it isn’t such big a problem as long as it doesn’t reach frightening proportions and starts to affect the child’s performance and his perception of education itself. Understanding the Affects of Anxiety? Anxiety could lead to a host of other problems in students. The most common ones include a bout of sudden headache, some loss of focus, abnormal fears, greater irritability, sudden bursts of anger and acute depression episodes. Stressful conditions can inhibit a student’s ability to retain and recall what he had learnt during an examination. This is primarily because anxiety creates a chemical imbalance in the brain. It has been proven without doubt that anxiety inhibits a child’s cognitive behaviour. This can be further understood by the impact of negative emotions. Anxiety causes the nervous system to function too fast or too lazily and the child’s ability to think clearly is hindered. There are some tips than can be taught by parents to prevent their children from developing anxiety. • Practicing Deep Breathing Most students face exam-related stress and anxiety. When such a moment occurs, try and make them focus off the negative sphere of mind. Make the child breathe deeply by involving the centre of the chest. This exercise can be done during the days prior to a test or just before appearing in a test. • Turn Around Self-questioning Usually when anxiety acts up, students start to think negatively and a lot of ‘What-if’ questions enter their minds. Students should be taught to turn around the negative questions into positive ones. For example, instead of thinking, “What if I can’t remember my notes?” try and tell your child to think, “What if every question comes from what I have learnt? How great would that be?” • Sleeping to be Calmer Examination days usually involve long, extended study sessions. However, parents should make sure that the child catches up on a minimum of seven hours of sleep per day. Sleep deprivation could lead to actually forgetting what one had learnt. • Last-minute Tips Children should be prevented from cramming too much information hours before the examination. Rather than last-minute preparations, parents should focus on keeping sure that their child is calm and revises what he has already learnt.

Every Parent’s Nightmare Most of the parent-child conflicts are those centred on daily activities like going to bed or waking up, limitations of going outdoors and school homework. Many parents feel as they are engaged in a constant power struggle with their children. Parents feel frustrated and worn out and the children feel questioned and irritated. In cases of extreme hostility between the two, a child may feel threatened and determined to resist his parents’ wishes. Trouble in the Making A parents’ attempt to control their children through authority could trigger resistance and violence in children. Even if young children react well to parent authority it could be just a case of temporary submission. The resentment, if any, inside the child would surface later when he grows up. This is when parenting turns violent as both the parents and the child try to control each other and there is a general loss of trust and goodwill in the whole family. Authoritative Parenting? Some parents are prone to threatening or using extreme authority over the children. They tend to make many demands and enforce them with punishment or promises. When the child crosses teenage years, such parents usually find themselves involved in a bitter struggle with their child. Even if children aren’t immediately resisting parental demands, parents could still be generating a negative environment every time they attempt to exert supremacy over the children. The Dilemma Most parents want their children to have the characters and the skills which enable them to make the best choices in life. However, they seem to ignore the fact that these skills can’t be developed if a child develops a fear of blame or parental punishment. Anger and resentment is common among children today as they try and fight out the level of parental control exerted on them. These negative feelings of anger and bitterness are sometimes expressed through self-destructive habits that a child develops. Many such children become violent at school, start using abusive behaviour or may get hooked on to bad company and the use of alcohol or even drugs. Finding a Solution Peaceful parenting begins from the time children are toddlers. The child at that age has to be made to realise what is wrong and not acceptable. The best way to make him follow a rule is leading by example. Again, to let him feel empowered, try and make the child responsible for certain household issues when he grows up. This could include taking care of the toolbox or buying the weekly quota of fruits for the family or keeping an eye as to which member of the family has been overspending. This process combines self-realisation and responsibility for the child. These skills help to create children who can embrace understanding and peace and are at ease with the idea of being disciplined and liberated at the same time.

Need for a Parent-teacher meeting Issues like a child’s speech delay or developing temper-related mannerisms are often discussed at parent-teacher meetings besides the obvious subject of the child’s classroom performance. These are many advantages for a caregiver and a parent to attend a parent-teacher conference. An insight into the psychology of the parents and the ability to evaluate the kind of atmosphere they are providing to the child at home, is of vital importance to a teacher. Parents too need to look beyond their child\’s academic performance and should seek an honest opinion regarding his shortcomings. Understanding the Parent Perspective It becomes vitally important that an open line of communication and responsive relationship is established between the parents and teachers who are attending such a conference. In order to do this, the parents and teachers need to stay in touch via informal conversations over a period of time. During the meet, it is crucial for the teachers and caregivers to be sensitive to the fact that most parents may have a thought process. The caregiver needs to ensure that they establish an open dialogue with the parents with the welfare of the child as its main theme. Even if the teacher has some serious issues with the child, it is imperative to establish a positive tone for the conference before embarking upon the discussion regarding the weaknesses of the child. Holding a Parent-teacher Meeting The teacher should try and arrange the parent-teacher meet at a convenient timing and should begin the meeting with some positive anecdotes about the child. The teacher should try and focus more on the abilities and competencies of the child before discussing his inadequacies. The teacher should try and encourage the parent\’s side of the discussion and their inputs. These contributions by the parents provide valuable insight in evaluating the child’s home environment and the kind of parent support he has. Tackling the Problem If the teacher has a grievance or a specific concern regarding the child’s performance, he should work out a methodology that involves the parents. An involved parent is a key component in sorting out the problems that a child faces. It is important to remember that the child’s upbringing combines a classroom and his home. The emphasis should be on planning a cooperative action plan with an honest follow-up. As the meeting reaches its conclusion, the parents should be encouraged to approach with any further questions or concerns that they might have.

Gifted children are indeed gifts for the parents. They make parents feel proud and achieve great success during their lifetime. It is important for parents to clearly understand the proper treatment that these children should receive, for they are often highly sensitive to relations. They are different from the normal children and need considerable attention for their proper development. Who is a gifted child? How are they identified? Gifted children are identified from their behaviour and acts. A gifted child may be a fast learner, very sensitive to feelings and emotions, inquisitive, methodical and deeply involved in subjects from an early age. Sometimes, gifted children are exposed to negative tendencies and may get involved with equal enthusiasm and vigour. Gifted children usually don’t mix up with the kids of their age. Their IQ and mental level may make them misfits in their respective age groups. Therefore, socializing is one of the aspects that need to be properly looked after. In classroom also, such children may feel bored or not interested. This can have impact on their studies. Gifted children may also face problems responding as emotional beings. They may be too sensitive to small issues and may alienate themselves from others. Social alienation is also found to be common problem with the gifted children. The parents should understand the needs of such children and try to avoid any situation, which might excite them more than they can safely handle. Like parents should be careful as not to scold the child or rebuke in public.

Some parents may assume that a playschool is a lot of fun, filled with the use of crayons and play-pens. The kids and the setting of all preschools may appear very innocent and similar but the kind of a preschool a kid steps into has far-reaching consequences on the child’s growth and development. A preschool lays the foundation for later academic success during formal education. Considerations When Choosing a Preschool (In order to provide an easy overview of some of the basic factors to be considered while choosing a preschool, examples have been quoted by assuming a preschool, called abc preschool for the sake of comparison.) • Credentials — most preschools are privately-owned and managed. Thus, they have the freedom to make their own rules. A defectively-managed preschool, for example, abc preschool employs teachers that don’t have the essential Early Childhood Educational qualifications. Now, compare this with a reputed preschool like Shemrock. Every staff member there is well-qualified and experienced. Parents should check out a preschool’s accreditations and certifications. • Time Schedule — this is something that parents often overlook as they can’t differentiate between a day care facility and a preschool. Day care centres often provide extended hours for taking care of kids, especially for working parents. However, a neighbourhood preschool, for example, abc preschool may offer shorter but more planned activities for the kids. Thus, the parents have to consider their personal schedule and the nature of preschool education they would prefer for their children. • Discipline — the most integral part of preschooling is introducing the children to the concept of discipline. This is where preschool policies become very crucial. The parents have to be beware of schools with very a very liberal outlook towards teacher authority. For example, a preschool, abc preschool insists upon scolding the children harshly or punishing them severely for the slightest of mistakes. Does it make sense to introduce your kids to such an extreme form of authority, so early in their lives? • On the other hand, a reputed preschool like Shemrock helps the children to make this transition into education and disciplining easy, by delving into child psychology and sorting out the emotional aspect of child behaviour. • Nutrition — one very important aspect of any good quality preschool is the kind of meals/food provided to the children. Some neighbourhood preschools may insist upon feeding the children tasty but unhealthy/fast-food/sugar-loaded kind-of-meals. Whereas, prestigious preschools like Shemrock have personal nutritionists to make sure that kids are provided healthy, tasty and wholesome meals. • School Safety — a close-by or neighbourhood preschool may be very convenient, but it could be compromising on the safety facet of a child. The security aspect is a very comprehensive concept and includes security in terms of the construction, infrastructure, transportation and even accessibility to the preschool campus by strangers.

Educators in India agree that formal education should ideally begin at the age of five. This is also the pattern followed and accepted across the nation. However, with many schools operating their own nursery grades, the definition of the term ‘formal’ education has been slightly altered. Generally, parents prefer that children start their education at the age of five, though there is a scope for some leverage in different parts of the country. However, rather than being obsessed about the age at which children start school in India, parents should also address issues like — • Good Preschooling • Helping the Child Start School Preschooling As the terms suggests, preschool is all about making a child prepared for his formal education. A child graduating from a preschool has better cognitive and learning skills and can easily adapt to the setting of a structured schooling programme. Skills taught at a preschool are essential before the beginning of statutory education. Preschool is addressed by different names. A preschool could be called a playschool, day-care, pre-primary, pre-nursery or kindergarten. Young parents are prone to be concerned about the age at which children should start school India, but they should first take care of the preschooling aspect as this gives the child a structured foundation for further learning. The basic skills developed at this age last throughout a child’s life. Helping the Child Start School Most children find it difficult to acclimatize themselves to the proper classroom setting of a school. This is because the environment in a school isn’t as liberal and fun-focussed as that of a preschool. Thus, once the parents are through with the headache of gaining admission to a good school and the anxiety pangs of the correct age at which children start school in India have subsided, they should concentrate on helping the child with getting ready for school. Some tips for parents have been listed below – • All the supplies mentioned by the school including things like books, school bag, crayons, etc. should be bought beforehand. • For the sake of the child’s safety and to make easier for others to guide him/her in the school premises, make sure that some of the items like the child’s clothing, lunch box, etc. are labelled with the child’s name/class/section. • The child should be made aware about the commuting plan, inclusive of the drop-off and pick-up details. • The parents should also prepare a hand-out for the school teacher or nurse, in case the child depends on particular medications. The night before the first day at school is very important for the child. Most children are very apprehensive and may ask a number of questions. The parents should — • Discuss the most probable morning routine with the child, including things like bath-time/bed-time/waking-up. Make the child aware that sticking to the schedule is necessary. • Try and talk to the child about the things that should be expected on the first day at school.

More and more people are turning towards the internet in order to search for information regarding the various preschool options. However, few of them are able to get the desired information. Yes, the perfect webpage to answer all your queries regarding the preschool is out there! The problem lies in the method of searching employed by the people. Most parents tend to use a search engine when searching for such information. They usually type a few words in the Query Box and then start scrolling through all the possible matches the search page displays. Search Phrase Usually, the words chosen to conduct the search play a very crucial role in finding the best-possible results. Typing in a vague phrase like — admission in playschool + kidzee, will lead to many off-target web pages that don’t deal with the required information. In fact, on most search engines, this phrase would list various websites that contain some articles/information related to Kidzee. This is because search engines are unable to decipher as to what is the exact nature of the query, from such a search phrase. The search phrase — ‘admission in playschool + kidzee’ could be interpreted as information sought related to: 1. Admissions in Kidzee 2. Some general information about Kidzee 3. What things should parents check out when seeking admissions for their child in a playschool? or 4. What are the issues related to admission in a playschool. Neither does conducting search with the term — admission in playschool + kidzee, lead to the main website of Kidzee. This is because the search term itself is too generic. The solution to this confusion is rather easy. • If a parent is seeking information about admission in Kidzee, then the search term has to be more specific like — admission in kidzee or “admission” kidzee. Both these search terms essentially lead to the main website of Kidzee, providing the necessary information on the page related to admissions. • However, if the parents are searching for information regarding issues like the appropriate age, things to check-out, etc. for admission to playschools, they could key in the phrase — admission in playschool — in the Search Box. After having gone through the articles/information related to playschool admissions, the parents could then seek further information regarding the playschool of their choice by typing in the name of the playschool in the search box, which would invariably lead to the main website of that playschool.

There are various methods of searching for the best-suited preschool for your child. Some parents make such decisions based the various forms of advertising that are used in the media, while some depend upon the feedback they receive from parents who already have children enrolled in a preschool. Many parents use the online option when searching for a preschool for their child. A common method of searching about a particular brand of preschool in Delhi is to type-in the name of the school, preceded by the main nature of the enquiry and lastly, the location is typed in. For example, keying in a search phrase like — admission age mother’s pride new Delhi — will initially list websites that are directly related to Mother’s Pride, followed by other websites that would be attuned to subjects like, the age for admission, perfect age for admission and even listings of websites highlighting the term ‘New Delhi’. Thus, it becomes apparent that the search term — admission age mother’s pride new delhi — doesn’t list the websites that provide the accurate and sought after information. So, what is the best approach towards making an online search for a parent? A Better Alternative The best and perhaps the easiest way to go about searching for information related to any preschool is to visit the main website of that particular preschool. Thus, instead of typing-in — admission age mother’s pride new delhi, a better option would be to type-in the brand of preschool or the preschool name, followed by a comma, followed by the city/location of your preference. For example, a search term like — mother\’s pride, new delhi or shemrock, new delhi would invariably bring you to that preschool’s main website. Now, the parents can not only checkout the various locations/availability of that preschool in New Delhi but also get a better idea about the activities and facilities that are provided by the preschool and any new changes in the curriculum/certification/affiliation that the preschool has incorporated. Further parents would realise that the availability of some facilities might vary from branch-to-branch. Most of the main websites of preschools are very informative in this regard. For example, Shemrock’s main website lists every kind of information that would be sought by a parent including — • Admission information • Activities and facilities • The education system at shemrock • Contact details • Resources for Parents and even • A Franchise Section Buzz up!

Overparenting is sometimes also called hyper-parenting. Both the terms signify the same thing — a wrong parenting style. It refers to a parenting style in which parents are overly-involved with their children. Such parents are often seen fighting at the school games or arguing with the school-coach because they felt that their kid was undermined in some way. Such parents are overly competitive and would go to the extent of writing and doing their child’s homework and assignments. A small drop in the child’s test scores is equivalent of the world ending for them. Hyperparenting is not limited to the big cities only. Over-ambitious parents are found in small towns and rural areas also. Basically, such parents are over-involved, over-controlling, too demanding and obsessive. Concerned Parenting versus Hyperparenting It is not uncommon to find parents who are very concerned about their child. The increasing stress in our daily lives and the ever-growing ambitions and frustrations of the parents often leads to a tendency of being preoccupied with the achievements and performance of one’s child. Many such parents feel that succeeding in every subject and every sphere of activity at school is an absolute necessity. They begin to associate the child’s success as their own. Concerned parenting is essential for being good parents, but when the concern of a parent turns into a fixation, it turns into something ugly — hyperparenting. Seeking Perfection An obsessive parent can be understood as someone who seeks perfection. This perfection should be reflected in both individual output as a capable parent and his child’s performance in terms of being a perfect student, an outperformer. Such parents are very determined to make every possible sacrifice for their child’s education. They begin to micromanage every aspect of the child’s life including social and academic aspects. Children of Over-involved Parents • Such obsessive parents don’t allow the child to take any independent decision. Thus, the children develop little self-confidence. The 24×7 scheduling and analysis done by the parents makes the child vulnerable to be acutely self-critical. • Children of such parents might also develop trust issues. They could start believing that the parent doesn’t trust them at all. Usually such children grow into over-dependent, hypercritical and untrusting individuals.

This is because of a very simple cause — children are just too young to be able to modulate or alter their emotions. They cannot exercise the same level of control as parents. Two-to-four-year-olds try to express their frustration via these angry outbursts. Children this age can’t express their needs or feelings to their parents or caregivers and tend to develop a kind of nervous energy, i.e. anxiety or anger. Adults too have the tendency of temper outbursts but they can usually control their frequency or the acuteness of such emotional outbreaks. Parents could follow a few tips in order to take control when their children present such situations. • Staying Calm The very first and most elementary of advices while handling an angry, irritated child is for the parents to stay calm and composed. The parents should acknowledge the child’s feelings which could be either of frustration, boredom or tiredness. They shouldn’t engage the child in a long conversation regarding how he feels. Rather parents should keep the dialogue short and communicate to the child that they are willing to help. It is advisable, when handling irritated toddlers, to have some of distraction distract the child. Parents could try and use some treat like his favourite chocolate shake to calm the child. • The Wiser Approach No matter how helpless the parents feel themselves, they shouldn’t reward a child’s repeated tantrum with too much attention. The idea behind is that the child shouldn’t start believing behaving angrily is just an easy way to garner the parent’s attraction or an easy treat. Secondly, the parents are a child’s perspective of what is good. Thus, the parents themselves can’t behave inappropriately. Sometimes neither of the above-mentioned steps seems to work and then the parents have only option, i.e. to leave the child alone. How to Avoid Tantrums? Tantrums are a sign of a child’s anger, frustration or something that is making the child very uncomfortable. In this context, it is important to realise what is the child’s tolerance level. The parents should work upon it and try and raise his level of tolerance against stressful situations and train him to be a calmer and more confident individual. One easy way of doing this is complimenting and rewarding the child’s good behaviour.

Parents should use all or a combination of these four basic ways to tackle child-related problems. Raising the Child’s Self-Esteem • Small things like a parent’s tone of voice, the usual body language and facial expressions make an impact on the child. Such things affect the child’s perspective of the world around him and play a major role in developing his personality. • Praising the smallest of child’s achievements however small they may be would improve his self-confidence and make him more confident of his abilities. This feeling of personal pride eventually reflects in the form of raised self-esteem. On the contrary, disparaging remarks and comments or constant comparison and negative speech makes the child feel worthless and look down upon himself. • When the child makes a mistake and it is apparent that he feels bad about it, don’t try and scold him or make him feel even more guilty of himself. This would induce the fear of making mistakes and make him prone to developing self-conflicting issues. Are you an Escapist? Some parents are guilty of venting out their frustrations or anger by shouting or being hyper-critical about the child. This kind of a negative parenting attitude makes the child feel unwanted. The child shouldn’t become an escape mechanism for the parents. The parents need to deal with their own set of problems and make sure that the child’s innocence is not hampered by their own disappointments in life. The children shouldn’t be used as a tool for achieving what a parent failed to do so himself/herself. The child’s ambition and freedom should be give priority. Discipline isn’t a Choice • The main purpose of disciplining the child is to make sure that he develops the right set of moral values, attitude, aptitude and manners. Children themselves are unable to identify the need for rules and regulations but it is the responsibility of the parent to make sure that the child isn’t getting away with too many liberties. An excess of freedom at one point in childhood could backfire as the child develops a mind of his own and doesn’t respect the opinion of his parents anymore. • Rules aren’t just for the child. The parents should be sincere enough to present themselves as good role models. Once this is established, the child has practically no excuse to break the house rules or consistently disobey his parents. Make Time for Your Children • Modern lives are very busy and it is difficult for parents and children to do simple things together like having a family meal but such simple family activities are essential and from the basis for parent-child bonding. • Parents can created a ‘special night’ every two weeks to get together and let the children decide what TV programme or movie they want to watch. • Parents who can’t meet their children in the morning could put a note in the child’s study room or in the kitchen with a few words of encouragement written on it. • Parents should look out for opportunities like attending the school concerts and games to make the child feel special and appreciated.

At the time of birth infants have an in-built protection against a number of diseases because of the large number of antibodies that pass through the placenta from the mother’s womb to the child. Breast-fed babies continue to get the same benefits due to the numerous antibodies found in breast milk. However, these antibodies can’t guarantee protection against every disease and this is why vaccination is needed. Vaccines are used to increase the strength of the child’s immune system. Some vaccines do cause mild side effects including soreness at the point of the injection but these aren’t serious when compared to the effects of the deadly diseases they protect against. Commonly-recommended Vaccinations for Children  • DTP, i.e. diphtheria, tetanus and pertussis. • IPV for polio. • Influenza • MMR, i.e. measles, mumps and rubella. • Chickenpox • Hepatitis A and Hepatitis B DTP Vaccine • Diphtheria — it is a very serious infection of the throat that can block the air passage. This causes severe breathing difficulties in children. • Tetanus or lockjaw — this is a very serious nerve disease. It can occur at any age and is caused by toxin-producing bacteria that are found in common wounds. • Pertussis or whooping cough — it is a common respiratory illness and has cold-like symptoms. This leads to severe coughing or a ‘whooping’ sound. This sound occurs because the child breathes deeply after the coughing bouts. The complications of pertussis occur in children under the age of one and those under the age of 6 months are very susceptible. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? The vaccine has been so successful that it has virtually eliminated diphtheria and tetanus among children. IPV-Polio • Polio begins as a viral infection that could eventually lead to permanent paralysis in children. • Immunization Schedule — the immunization schedule includes giving the poliovirus vaccine or IPV at different stages, i.e. at the ages of 2 months, 4 months, 6 to 18 months and then between 4 to 6 years. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? Protection against polio occurs in more than 95% of children immunized. Influenza Vaccine • Influenza is commonly referred to as the flu and is a contagious viral infection of the respiratory airway. Contracting this disease could prove fatal for the children. • Immunization Schedule — the flu shot is given in a fixed schedule which includes shots when the child is 6 – 59 months old. For kids below the age of nine, two separate shots are given at an interval of a month. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? The flu vaccine isn’t completely effective but it reduces the person’s chances of contracting flu by nearly 80%. Getting a shot, gives the body some sort of immunity against the virus. MMR Vaccine • The MMR vaccine immunizes against measles, mumps and the deadly rubella virus. • Immunization Schedule — the MMR vaccinations are delivered in two separate doses. The first does is administered between the age of 12 – 15 months and the second between 4 to 6 years. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? Measles, mumps and rubella are infections which later lead to many complicated illness. The vaccine is extremely effective in protecting the child. Varicella or the Chickenpox Vaccine • The varicella vaccine helps to protect against chickenpox — a common and very contagious viral illness. • Immunization Schedule — the vaccine is given by injection between the age of 12 to 18 months. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? The vaccine is effective enough to prevent severe illness in nearly 95% of children who get immunized in time. Hepatitis A Vaccine • The hepatitis A virus or the HAV causes a number of symptoms which usually occur together. These include fever, nausea, vomiting and jaundice. If not controlled, the infection can spread and cause an epidemic. • Immunization Schedule — the vaccine is ideally administered to children 12 to 23 months old. A second dose follows, 6 months later. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? Vaccination against HAV is vital because even infected children many not have any of the above symptoms for a long period. This is a life-saving vaccine. Hepatitis B Vaccine • Hepatitis B virus or the HBV affects the liver. The infected child becomes a lifelong carrier of the virus. This leads to problems like cirrhosis or degeneration the liver or liver cancer. • Immunization Schedule — this vaccine is given in a set of three injections. The first shot is given to infants, just after birth. The second shot is administered between the age of 1 – 4 months and the third at the age of 6 to 18 months. • Why is the Vaccine Recommended? The hepatitis B vaccine has been very successful and gives extended immunity to the child. This kind of immunity carries from childhood to adulthood. This decreases the risk of getting any kind of chronic liver disease.

A Reality Check for Parents One really difficult challenge that is faced by each parent, especially those with really young children, is teaching the children to be cautious when outside the safety of home. The reality about most child abductions is different from the dramatic way in which they are portrayed on TV. These are some of the realities regarding child abductions — • A majority of children reported missing are those who have either run away from home or there is a misunderstanding with the parents about where they were supposed to be. • The majority of children are abducted or kidnapped by someone familiar or a far-away family member or some family acquaintance. Only 25% of kids are kidnapped by absolute strangers. • Most children are kidnapped by men and most abductions involve female children. • Mostly teenaged children are abducted. • Children are seldom abducted from the school premises. Strategies to Fight Child Abductions • The parents should keep ID-like updated photographs of their children, i.e. get them clicked every six months. Getting the children fingerprinted is an excellent idea. These two measures serve as a big assistance to the local police department in case the child is reported missing. • Being careful about online safety. The internet is a big help to everyone but in the case of kids it is a breeding ground for sexual predators stalking them. Parents should keep a tract of the child’s chat room interests, e-mail friends and the sites often visited. Make sure that that the child never gives out personal information. Children should avoid posting their photos on adult-themed sites. • Supervise the children in crowded places like malls, markets, movie halls, parks and public bathrooms. • Never leave a child alone in the car, even for a few minutes. For a serial kidnapper, it takes barely 3 to 4 minutes to abduct a child aged between 4 and 7. • Choosing the child’s caregivers – parents should keep a keen eye of the people with whom the child interacts including babysitters, neighbourhood friends, day-care providers and nannies. Check out references of domestic helps before hiring them. • If someone else is scheduled to pick-up the child from the school or childcare centre, explain the arrangements of travelling and being picked up to the child. Ask the child not to deviate from the instructions, no matter what. • Don’t dress children with name tags — children tend to easily trust adults who address them with their real names. • Make some ground rules for children. Instruct them to never to hold hands or talk with a stranger. If a stranger tries to touch them, the children should scream out loud. Such precautions have to be instilled in the children by the parents.

Parents face a problem of sharing time with their children. Fewer hours spent with a child translates into lesser ability to understand and comprehend the issues faced by the children. Children feel isolated and thus start taking more independent decisions. This excess of liberty eventually means that they have an increased tendency to disobey their peers and parents. Media’s Role The vacuum created by the parents has been filled in by the satellite channels, television stations, magazines and radio stations. Children are turning to this medium to use it as a guiding tool to make their decisions. There has been a sudden explosion of violence, gore and showcase of self-righteous celebrities on television. This has made the children more antisocial and aggressive and moral values are being lost. Coping with the Challenge Parents should make a planned effort to raise responsible children. The parents have to understand the importance of finding a more flexible parental approach and avoid any extremes. Parenting has to be a balancing act between a number of emotions and issues like— • Balancing Control and Affection The children respond better to parents who can balance affection with some level of parental authority. The affection has to be in the form of love and warmth and quality family time. But it should be accompanied with an appropriate level of parental control. The parents have to limit the children from taking undue advantage of their liberties. Parents should use their own example as a guiding plan to help the children when they are in distress. This kind of balance ensures scope for individual development and increased self-esteem in the child without compromising on the respect for parents. • Balancing Family Time Toddlers do need a lot of time and physical affection. As the children grow, such needs become less. But parents shouldn’t abstain from praising their children. Children who have some kind of regular positive interaction with parents or have access to quality parent time are more confident and perform better, academically. Just talking with the child about his school day or games can help strengthen the parent-child relationship. However , spending time with children shouldn’t mean giving into every whim and fancy of the child or let the child blabber on, without putting up a decent argument.

The child’s doctor is often not given his due importance by parents. Usually the doctors are overscheduled and finding enough time just to meet them seems like an arduous task to most parents. However, effective communication with the family doctor or the specialist taking care on one’s child could have a lot of advantages, especially when trying to find out what is best for the child’s health and getting an insight into the way a child thinks or any secrets that the child may be keeping from his parents. Doctor-Parent Relationship Health information is more readily available than before and parents keep themselves informed via the internet, books and TV. This is a welcome change, because now parents can contribute in their child’s healthcare. However, the parents might do too much of their own thinking and get hooked on to misplaced health information. Parents shouldn’t question the authority of the doctor based upon such information. However, they should ask the doctor about the purpose of a medication or a health plan he has prescribed for the child. Another common problem that parents have with the child’s doctor is their own unwillingness to trust the doctor’s diagnosis. Such hypochondriac parents may seek expensive or high-strength drugs for common ailments of their child and may start arguing with the doctor. Communicating with the Doctor For better communication with the child’s doctor, the parents should be clear about what to expect from the doctor. A concerned but informed parent should look upon a doctor to • Help in monitoring the child’s health. • Explain the child’s growth and development patterns – physical and emotional. • Diagnose and treat the child’s illnesses and devise a health regimen for the child. • Explain the child’s illnesses and the course of treatment including the precautions. • Provide referrals for specialists in case of specific symptoms or major illnesses. Some pointers for parents — • The doctor should feel that the parents actually trust him with their child’s health. It isn’t a wide decision to argue with the doctor for each of his decisions or diagnoses. Developing and maintaining this parent-doctor trust is very critical. • When the doctor asks about the child’s health, the parents should explain the actual and not ‘supposed’ concerns, specifically and clearly. • Parents should tell the doctor about any abnormal symptom the child has shown or drastic changes in the family life like parent’s divorce or death in the family.

Time-out is basically a disciplining strategy that can be employed by parents. Here, the child is asked to spend a few moments, usually 4 to 7 minutes, alone in a room. He is asked not to play or talk but rather think about what he/she has done wrong and why the punishment is being handed out. This is a form of self-realisation and a mild disciplining tool. Time-outs can be very effective as a non-violent and not-too-harsh punishment. The fear of hurting the child is eliminated. The concept is based on evoking the feelings of guilt to make the child realise his mistake. Temperamental Parenting? Many parents have realised that time-outs don’t work for their child. This is because of different individual temperaments. Temperament-based parenting doesn’t insist upon using time-outs. Every child is unique and has a different personality. Temperamental parenting is able to solve some child-related problems that time-outs don’t seem to. Stuck with Time-outs? Repetitive behavioural pattern isn’t solved by using repetitive time-outs. These can easily frustrate a parent as they occur often and a similar punishment, i.e. using a time-out doesn’t solve the problem. If a child consistently fails to bring home the things needed to do an assignment, the parents are left feeling helpless. A repetitive time-out pattern could make the child lose confidence in the parent’s capabilities. Temperament-based Parenting Strategies Temperament-based strategy encourages the parents to develop a plan which is communicated to the child. The plan includes a signal or verbal reminder as the primary step. In cases of non-compliance, taking away a privilege from the child is recommended. If the misbehaviour still continues more privileges including allowances and playtime are taken away. Main Principles of Temperamental Parenting • Temperament also involves the intrinsic parts of a child’s behaviour pattern. • Many temperament responses are obvious because they manifest due to a child’s behaviour. • Temperament is more apparent in circumstances that involve a sudden change or stress. Challenging situations elicit more honest temperamental responses. • Task persistence is nothing else but a child’s tendency to stick with a task until it’s done. • Negative reaction is because of the child’s inability to make suitable judgements. • Temperament doesn’t change easily and quickly. • Approach and withdrawal are the child’s first reaction to new situations.

Most individuals, including children, tend to develop a preference for one kind of learning style over another. The vast majority of children respond better to the visual path of teaching. The second most preferred medium of instruction is auditory. People usually use a combination of visual and auditory modes to impart education. However, it is necessary to recognise what kind of learning inclination or style does the child have which in turn is a direct reflection of his way of thinking. Your Child has Learning Difficulties? Difficulties usually arise when a child’s preferred educational mode of instruction gets blocked. For example, a child may be suffering from visual problems like focusing on what is being instructed or he has problems in the eye-brain pathway. Again, a child who depends heavily on hearing something to be interested in it may be suffering from some kind of an auditory problem. It is advisable to make sure that the child isn’t facing any of such issues. Verbal or Visual Learning? Children could also have a learning style that could be mainly described as being verbal which means that they have a thought processes that takes place in the verbal domain or they could have a principally visual mode of learning which means that their thought processes mainly functions in the pictorial representation format. Those with a verbal style of learning tend to react better to lesson being read out aloud in the classroom. Those with a more visual mode will react better to detailed illustrations and drawings that accompany text. Such students are much better at observations and drawing inferences. A visual learner is a student who learns much better well from a stimulus presented to him, invariably a stimulus which can be seen, not just instructed or ‘told’ to him. This kind of a student learns more by looking around and observing his surroundings. Individual Preferences There are other factors which contribute to a complete assessment of an individual’s preferred style of learning. Such factors are the actual, conscious and voluntary choices of a student or any learner. Some children may prefer the independent way of studying, i.e. without the company of some friends or classmates while some vs. are dependent learners, i.e. when asked to study alone they tend to get anxious by the mere feeling of being alone in a study room. Buzz up!

Reading aloud to children is the most fundamental aspect of nurturing a young, growing reader. Reading aloud is very beneficial for children, especially the really young ones. By listening to stories, a sense of curiosity regarding reading and books is created within them. A child whose home environment includes listening to well-read, animated stories is likely to develop an affinity for creativity, reading and in general for books. Where to Read? Try and locate natural and interesting reading spots like under a tree or at a nearby park. Inside the home, try and read to the child before bedtime. In the child’s room by spreading a soft cushion on the floor. In the backseat of the parked family car. When to Read? Start as early as possible. Reading aloud helps to quieten a weeping baby and to entertain a gloomy one. Continue to read aloud even after the child has learnt to read himself. There are always words and parts of the text he won’t be able to comprehend and there the parent’s involvement again becomes very important. Special time should be set aside, every day, to read out for the children. This could be just before naptime or at bedtime. During times of family visits, for example at a family breakfast, at the grandparent’s place. During daily household chores. The child could be asked to read when the parents are cleaning the dishes. The child could be asked to read from the morning newspaper, while the parents are having their breakfast. A child\’s reactions have to be judged. Children getting restless when being read to, mean they are losing interest. Try and evaluate if the settings of the reading place are affecting his interest levels. What to Read? There is a wide choice available to a parent. Special children books are available. Other sources include magazines and newspapers. Parents could also include on-the-spot reading like that of road signs, menus and catalogues and billboards. There are many rhymes and songs especially meant for children. Children love to hear and swing to rhythmic poems and even jingles. Young children also enjoy picture books accompanied with stories and colourful illustrations. Parents have a wide range of selections and it is necessary to keep introducing new themes and characters to keep the young readers engrossed. Newspapers also offer a lot of stuff that can be used for slightly elder children. These include choosing articles with smaller sentences. Being flexible is necessary. If the child doesn\’t enjoy the book being read, it makes sense for the parent not to be stubborn and try some new reading material.

A home library doesn’t need to be very elaborate or costly to impress upon a child. Fancy and expensive books needn’t necessarily be the only way to capture a child’s imagination. A family should have the suitable reading material, presented in the right manner so that approaching the library and reading becomes easier for the child. Setting up a Library It is not the size of a home library but its location and appearance that is more significant. Simply, a corner of a room with lots of bookshelves, some comfortable seated furniture and good artificial and natural lighting are the prime requisites. Size of the Library The size would vary according to the number of books which are stored or placed in the library. The special interest and fondness of each family member should be taken care of and the library should be arranged in such a way that there is enough space for books pertaining to each kind of liking expressed by the family members. For children, books should be stocked in terms of present and further reading material and the library should be big enough to comfortably choose and browse through the books they are fond of. Display of the Library There is a wide range of objects which can be manipulated or used to build up a family library. These include new or used bookcases with some built-in shelves and even open magazine racks. These provide an easy-to-approach display for the books which is essential to attract a child. The reading material for children should be placed on the lowest of shelves. Children books should be grouped together and some other interesting reference books should be placed next to them, just to fire the curiosity of the child. Making Small Family Libraries Other common things that can be used to create a rather small family library include, • Cinder-block Bookshelves — cinder blocks, small decorated bricks or particle-board shelves can be found at any hardware store. These blocks can be arranged on top of each other and then a shelf can be placed on them, giving it a bookshelf-like appearance. • Crate Bookcases— these are perfect for stacking children’s books. Plastic crates are available in varying sizes in most departmental stores. The child can be asked to paint and decorate the crate. These make very durable, cheap and easy-to-maintain bookshelves.

Human development is a continuous process and begins very early in the human life. Every individual, from the time of birth, undergoes physical, behavioural and emotional changes. Similarly, children in the age group of four-to-five, have specific developmental changes and any deviation from them should be checked out with the family doctor. Recognising Physical Development in Children For children in the age group of four-to-five there are some normal physical developmental characteristics that a parent needs to know. • Children in this age group grow at a slower rate than infants and toddlers. Usually their body organs grow faster than the body. This usually gives the preschoolers a rounded-tummy appearance. • Their height should at least 50 percent of their adult height and the body weight should be 20 percent of the adult body weight by the age of five. • Most children at this age develop their motor skills and can skip, run and climb. • Most of trained preschoolers are able to tie their shoelaces, buttons and draw rough but recognizable figures. • Have an increased lung capacity and develop the tendency to breathe more deeply. • Most of these children have lost or are in the process of losing their ‘baby look’ as the limbs grow longer. • Children of this age group will look about the same size — regardless of the gender. • There is a remarkable increase in the overall physical condition and some resistance to germs and repeated infections is also present. However, such developing immunity is very subjective among preschoolers and may vary with each of them. Cognitive Development in Children Aged 4 to 5 • They interrelate with and learn more about their surroundings much better through playful activities rather than being taught or instructed. • They start to realise their home and family members through exploration and inquisitiveness. • Begin to show signs of more affection for a particular family member or a caregiver. • Start to follow and understand basic rules — the first signs of accepting authority. • Understand and start of follow regular activities like brushing their teeth and washing hands. Emotional Development in Children Aged 4 to 5 • They do rely on caregivers but don’t need constant physical contact like toddlers. • They continue to express emotions and begin to return hugs, kisses and respond very physically to people. • Begin to develop affinity for certain children of their age group — a precursor of their tendency to start recognising preferences and developing relationships. • Learn to recognize foods that don’t taste good and start to associate with smells of foods they don\’t like.

Transition Time for Preschoolers and Elementary Students Children progress through many grades during their school days and they face many challenges. Changing academic demands make some students very jittery and they find it difficult to deal with the emotional changes. Educators have identified certain transition points in a child’s school life which are predominantly demanding and the children usually need emotional support when faced with these challenges — physical, emotional, social and academic. Preschool, elementary and upper elementary are the very first of the transitions that a child is faced with. Preschool Transition Physical/Emotional Challenges — for most children, preschool is an introduction to conducting themselves without the presence of their parents. Children begin to realise the very concept of discipline and manners. Social Challenges — toddlers at a preschool have to conduct their activities together and develop friendships with each other. Academic Challenges — preschoolers develop listening, basic reading and recalling skills and paying attention. Early Elementary Transition Physical/Emotional Challenges — transition to a grade school means attending bigger classrooms and longer school days, i.e. extended separation from parents and the usual caregivers. The students have to adjust to the concept of daily time tables and a routine life. Completion of assignments becomes essential. Social Challenges — children form much more comprehensive friendships as compared to preschool and develop their first set of ‘best’ friends. Academic Challenges — children are introduced to basic reading and mathematical calculations. They learn how to read and make an effort to understand the meaning of words. They begin to identify with the characters in stories. Upper Elementary School Physical/Emotional Challenges — in the elementary grades, more independence is handed over to the children. Different personalities of the students begin to emerge and their different aptitudes are more apparent. Social Challenges — children try and expand friendships and begin to work in cooperation with each other and tend to get more comfortable in once particular kind of social circle. Academic Challenges — the mere acquisition of basic skills becomes redundant. Now, children are expected to be able to use basic skills to acquire information and solve problems, to be competent in reading comprehension and writing skills.

Letting the Child Know About the Importance of Homework If a child is watching TV beyond the regular, stipulated hours – tell him so and discourage the child to do such an act again. Make sure that the child is not making casual telephone calls during the homework time. But a call to a classmate about an assignment should be acceptable. Children need to realise that the family members too agree with the importance of completing assignments. If the family has to occasionally let go of an outing or a visit to the mall to accommodate homework time, they should do so. This reminds the child of the small sacrifices the family is making for his education. Setting up a Schedule The child should be used to a regular time to complete his homework. This helps a child to finish assignments in time and still have enough time to play. A good study schedule should work for the child and the family. A schedule that works well in one family unit may not work in another. Making the child complete the homework just before bedtime is always a bad idea. This decreases the probability of the child recognizing its importance. Other activities including playing a sport or getting music lessons too should be flexible with respect to the homework schedule. If sometimes there isn’t enough time to finish assignments, the child shouldn’t mind cancelling out one of the outside activities. Creating the Right Environment One of the most important requirements for studying at home is the right place to study. Make sure that the study area isn’t too fanciful. Placing a simple desk and chair in a quiet place is usually good enough. The place should be well lit, preferably with a good amount of natural light and ventilation and should be away from distractions like television or music. Removing Distractions Some children tend to study better with quiet surroundings. This should not be associated with a weak concentration level. Similarly, some children react better to learning with the music being played. Again, this shouldn’t be treated as being stubborn or being distracted. These tendencies are in-built and shouldn’t be argued with or squashed just because they may seem unreasonable to a parent. Getting the Child Involved Simple resources like a pencil, pen, paper and supplies of glue and scissors should be kept handy. Try and shop for such goods with the child. The child begins to associate the importance of homework and the ‘fun’ quotient of doing schoolwork is increased when he shops for his favourite geometry set or the latest brand of coloured pencils.

Getting a child to love reading or helping reluctant young readers is a challenge faced by most parents. Kids do learn reading skills at school but developing reading as a habit and associating pleasure with reading is best inculcated in children by the parents. Get them Started One of the easiest and the most effective way to encourage children to start reading is by getting them interested in what the book holds. This is best done by reading aloud their favourite poems or the latest comic books. Once a child gets hooked on to a few characters, his own curiosity would take care of him getting genuinely interested in reading. For this, the parents need to start off early. Even a toddler can see pictures and react to them if the parent is holding the book and helps the child associate each picture with a sound or an exaggerated expression. This kind of reading time should be planned without the distraction of a TV or the mobile phones ringing. Once a child develops a particular interest, ask him to read a few pages to you. This helps to develop the child’s confidence and elocution and public speech talents. Further, the parents can act as the audience and make sure that the child reads and pronounces the words correctly. A Reading Stimulus Simple tricks like always having books and magazines around the house is a good way to make the child realise that books are an essential and commonly-found article in the house. Sooner or later, the child is bound to be fascinated by some particular theme or characters in some magazine or book. It is a smart idea to start a small, well-kept home library for children where then can sit and read and even borrow books for their friends. Allowing little children to touch or smell and even hold books can make them feel associated with books. For this purpose, parents should think about getting durable books and pick paperbacks or plastic-covered books for smaller kids. When reading out aloud, choose books that the child prefers. There numerous children\’s books and selecting the best among them is a formidable task. It is better to take the children to book fairs or bookshops and let them make a choice for themselves. However, if the children are of school-going age, they should be encouraged to visit the school library. Parents should talk to them about the purpose of a library and encourage children to get books issued from their school library.

The most recent parenting trend, at least in the urban centres is opting to have just one child. Thus, more urban children are becoming the only child. The second child is often not wanted in preference to have better careers or the reluctance of women to undergo motherhood twice or financial limitations. Some people actually believe that a single child has a much higher chance of being successful in life as he would be getting the undivided attention of his parents and the maximum parental and family support. The Challenge However, contrary to the common belief that bringing up the only child or the sole child has many challenges and parenting issues related to it. Besides the obvious problem of keeping the sole child busy in a nuclear family set-up, there are many other issues too. • Problem — a single child is becomes the centre of all the parental attention and hence the family expectations from the child are usually high. There is a tremendous pressure on the sole child to be very successful in school and in life. Solution — the parents should learn to tone down their expectations and be more realistic in their approach towards the child. The very thinking that they have made a huge sacrifice by having just one child is rather regressive. Single-child parenting is a choice that the parents make themselves. • Problem — there is always the possibility of the only child being pampered by the parents. This pampering or overindulgence sometimes spreads over to the grandparents also. This childhood indulgence could make the child develop serious adjustment problems in a social circle. Solution — the parents have to fight their temptation to overindulge the child and make sure that the child develops social adaptability rather than feeling like the ‘king’ of his domain, i.e. his home and the parent’s undivided attention. • Problem — the single child doesn’t have a sibling at home to bond with. Thus, the child tends to develop a very strong and sometimes obsessive bond with the parents and this turns into over-dependence for everything including homework and entertainment. Solution — the parents have to create opportunities for the child to interact with children in his age group. This could be achieved by taking the child to public parks and other play areas where the chances of the child’s social interaction with other kids in enhanced. Parents should try and increase their social interaction with their relatives and cousins and encourage the child to share more of his personal things including toys with others.

Issues like a child’s speech delay or developing temper-related mannerisms are often discussed at parent-teacher meetings besides the obvious subject of the child’s classroom performance. These are many advantages for a caregiver and a parent to attend a parent-teacher conference. An insight into the psychology of the parents and the ability to evaluate the kind of atmosphere they are providing to the child at home, is of vital importance to a teacher. Parents too need to look beyond their child’s academic performance and should seek an honest opinion regarding his shortcomings. Understanding the Parent Perspective It becomes vitally important that an open line of communication and responsive relationship is established between the parents and teachers who are attending such a conference. In order to do this, the parents and teachers need to stay in touch via informal conversations over a period of time. During the meet, it is crucial for the teachers and caregivers to be sensitive to the fact that most parents may have a thought process. The caregiver needs to ensure that they establish an open dialogue with the parents with the welfare of the child as its main theme. Even if the teacher has some serious issues with the child, it is imperative to establish a positive tone for the conference before embarking upon the discussion regarding the weaknesses of the child. Holding a Parent-teacher Meeting The teacher should try and arrange the parent-teacher meet at a convenient timing and should begin the meeting with some positive anecdotes about the child. The teacher should try and focus more on the abilities and competencies of the child before discussing his inadequacies. The teacher should try and encourage the parent’s side of the discussion and their inputs. These contributions by the parents provide valuable insight in evaluating the child’s home environment and the kind of parent support he has. Tackling the Problem If the teacher has a grievance or a specific concern regarding the child’s performance, he should work out a methodology that involves the parents. An involved parent is a key component in sorting out the problems that a child faces. It is important to remember that the child’s upbringing combines a classroom and his home. The emphasis should be on planning a cooperative action plan with an honest follow-up. As the meeting reaches its conclusion, the parents should be encouraged to approach with any further questions or concerns that they might have.

Parental involvement is one of the most crucial parts of a child\’s complete education. Parents should try and use a combination of a few simple measures to ensure that they aren’t compromising on a chance of improving their child’s focus, behaviour and overall performance. Attending PTAs PTA meetings are crucial and should be attended by parents, no matter how busy their life’s schedule is. Usually, the parents complain about the lack of time or interest after a hard day at the office but showing up a school meeting and school events is ample proof for the child that his welfare and education is of top priority for his parents. Parents have the liberty to be either: • Be a new-age PTA parent and participate online OR • Be an old-fashioned PTA parent and be actually present Staying Connected Parents should use easily-accessible tools like e-mail to stay in touch with the child\’s school authorities. Besides the often-circulated printed newsletters, schools have websites that help to keep the parents informed about the latest developments at school. In some schools, the teachers even distribute their personal e-mail IDs among the classmates for their parents to freely communicate and stay connected. Get Involved One easy way of easily finding out about the child\’s performance at school is by having an honest conversation with his teacher and parents of the classmates. Parents should find ways of contributing to school events. Simple contributions like writing an article for the school newsletter or making goodies for school celebrations shows to the other PTA members that the parents are serious about making a difference to the quality of education being imparted at the school. Getting support and sympathy of the PTA assures that the child is looked after and cared for. Helping Each Other Out Parents should try and stay connected with the other parents. Parenting isn\’t easy for anyone but talking it out with other concerned parents can help out to sort out issues which one set of parents haven’t been able to do so on their own. There is a huge probability that the other parent might have some experiences and hence, insight by having had been through a similar problems with their children. Parents could try and set up a parent help group which could be either in the residential block or even at the office. Children who have involved and caring parents, exhibit: • Higher grades better test scores. • Improved school attendance and low anxiety. • Motivation and increased sense of self-esteem. • Lower rates of absenteeism or suspension. • Reduced instances of violent behaviour.

It is vital that the parents establish a time-based regimen from the early age stages of a child’s life. There should be a set pattern devoted to both doing homework and playing outdoors and helping out with house chores. Planning the weekend is very useful. This is a time when the child has more time than on school days. The weekend could be sued to catch upon pending assignments and for planning ahead the school week. Similarly, if the child has been studying very hard during the weekdays, the weekends should be used to ensure that he is fresh and ready for the week ahead. Time management eventually translates into the child finding enough time for each of his activities and homework isn’t just squeezed in the daily pattern of activities. Developing the Right Attitude A child as young as someone in the first grade needs to understand that doing homework isn’t a matter a choice rather it is an absolute necessity. This may require the parents to behave a bit stricter than they usually are, but once this idea is set in the child’s psychology it seldom requires the parents to explain it again. This one-time effort is essential to make sure that the child looks upon completing his school assignments as a part of his daily routine and not as a predicament. Encouraging a Struggling Child Some children have more difficulty in getting used to sitting down in a place and studying and completing their homework. For such children, the parents have to exhibit how easy it is to concentrate. For this, if the child is facing difficulty in reading for more than a few minutes, the parents should sit down with him and they should read together. If the child complains about too much homework, help him out and tell him that he is not alone in this. What is ‘Helping-out’ with Homework? The parents should be careful and not get over-involved with the child’s studies. They are supposed to provide guidance and not answers for school assignment. By providing answers, the child’s learning abilities get compromised and he would become dependent on his parents rather than seeking their assistance and his own efforts get compromised.

The best way to promote good learning habits in children is through a joint effort, involving both families and schools. This way responsibility is shared for creating a better working relationship which is concentrated towards the child\’s overall development. Parents can help out the education received at school and the effort made by the teachers by implementing some simple measures at home. These include: Reading Together: When adult family members read out aloud to or with their children on a regular basis, the interest level of the child improves. Taking children to the library and helping them find suitable books is another way of inculcating reading and learning habits among them. Such habits assist the teachers in improving upon the child’s reading, writing and general learning skills. Establishing a Family Routine: Routines could include setting up a timeframe for completing homework, running household errands, eating meals and watching television. A family routine balances and complements the disciplining being conducted at school by the teachers. Using Television: Parents should limit the amount of time spent by children, watching the television. They should help the child choose the appropriate programs for viewing. Some TV programs help raise the level of curiosity in certain subjects and act as a resource for the lessons being taught in school. Keep in Touch: Parents should be aware of what the children are learning, in terms of their assignments, projects and examinations. A child’s progress should be ascertained with regular communication with the teachers and by regularly attending the PTA meetings. Praise and Encouragement: Parents and families play a significant role in affecting a child’s confidence and motivation to become a good student. They should encourage the child to complete his weekly assignments and participate in extracurricular activities as well. Teachers contribute to the child’s classroom learning. However, they can increase the child’s performance by involving the parents and making them a part of the education imparted. This can be done by: Involving Parents in Activities: Teachers can increase the scope of involvement of families by asking for their help with specific activities. Parents can participate by organizing classroom materials or by serving on some school committee or providing their spare time at classroom activities. The more involved parents are likely to understand the teacher’s practices and expectations from the students. Involving Parents in Decision-making: A parents’ perspective should be discussed before making decisions about the children’s teaching tools. School programs should involve the family members in setting academic goals for the children. Parents should be informed about the changing school policies and services. Parent/teacher conferences should be looked upon as an opportunity to exchange viewpoints and deciding upon the best possibilities for improving the child’s performance.

Essentially, like any other form of good communication, a parent/teacher forum for corresponding involves meeting each other. The parents should be positive and courteous when meeting a teacher and seek his/hers’ honest opinion about their child. This ensures that the parent gets a true, first-hand true account of the child’s performance in school and the problems he is facing. When to Have a Conversation? Parents should find out about the most suitable time to talk to a teacher. If the parent is at school, he/she could be tempted to abruptly ask about the child’s well being, which could be latching on to an unprepared teacher. It is imperative to check with the teacher if the time is convenient for a conversation. If a parent does happen to bump into a school teacher or staff somewhere in the town, limit the communication to exchanging pleasantries. Such accidentals meetings form a part of a social scenario and are not meant for a parent-teacher discussion. Parents Should Look Forward to Scheduling a Special Meeting with the Teacher if: • The child has special needs and the teacher needs to be informed about them before the new academic session begins. • The child’s grades have dropped rather suddenly. • The parent’s suspect that the child is having difficulty in understanding what is being taught in the classroom. • The child is very upset about something that had happened in school but isn’t volunteering to speak about it or is very hesitant in doing so. • The child never seems to do his homework and yet the teachers aren’t complaining. • Some changes at home have happened which could directly affect the child. For example, someone in the family has died or the parents are about to get divorced. Having the Right Conversation: The best form of a conference or any purposeful communication is when both the teacher and parents stay composed and try to work out a strategy to solve the problem regarding the child. Arguing and blaming anyone usually doesn’t solve an issue and the same common sense is applicable here. A Few Good Questions to Ask: • Is the child performing differently in different subjects and if yes, why? • How well does the child get along with the other children? • Which are the child\’s best and worst of subjects? • Does the child work to his true potential? • Does the child participate in class discussions? • Is the child prone to miss classes or skip school?

Summers are pleasing and everyone needs a break…may be a sun tan, a dip in the pool or a tropical treat. There is one good thing about summer, which is in fact more than a good thing – Vacations. Spending some of the best moments with the family leaves long lasting impressions on everyone. The average working day is too boring and lifeless – parents at the office, attending meetings, children at school and then study and homework – there are few moments to celebrate or cherish. Come vacations and we will be merrymaking, if that is what you felt or promised to the children and other members of the family then stick to your word. But, what are you going to do this vacation – roam around in the city from one shopping center to another with frequent pauses – long pauses – at the traffic lights and in the traffic jams. No, sir. Bad choice. Let it be a grand celebration this time, wait a minute; how much will be the bill! Before planning anything you must consider the impact on your purse and how far you can go. We don’t have anything against you if you are planning for Disney’s or Waterworld, but there are other ways of doing it. All pleasure, fun and excitement are not to be bought from credit cards only. A simple walk in the countryside can be more thrilling than a month’s journey. Now that depends on your taste and what your family likes. But when it comes to cutting the cost and being effective at the same time we may give you some valuable advice. Let us start from higher budgets. Extended family vacations are one way to enjoy and pamper everyone in the summers. There are many places you can go – a nearby hill station, beach resort (not with kids), a hotel at the seaside or travel to the nearby city. But then, you will have to pay for the resorts, hotels, restaurants, transportation and other interesting places you happen to visit. At hill stations, beautiful settings, pure oxygen and peaceful ambience are for free. To make your trip more fruitful and a learning experience to your children, just go for family camping. Camping has the greatest advantage that you don’t have the restriction of being stationed to one place or geographical point. It brings you close to the nature and at the same time reduces some burden on your purse. But be careful as some tour operators charge hefty amounts for family camping. Amusement parks, easiest to reach, always available and no planning required. All you need to do is get the list and leave for the day. You may plan it for a week for different parks and places. It is a family treat, and that is what is soothing in the summers.

Public schools have different meanings for schools established in different countries. In North America and U.S., public schools are those that are administered by the state and are also called as state schools. In Britain and some other countries in Europe, public schools refer to a particular type of schools that evolved from popular schools in the past. In Britain, public schools may demand a fee from the students for various education facilities. In India, public school is more like a brand name, which represents that of the schools established in United Kingdom. As Indian education system still bears the influence of the British education system, the concept of public schools has survived in this country. Public schools are accessible to general public. For public schools, the government provides for the non discriminatory nature of the school. Anyone can receive the education in the public school, provided the students in question are citizens of that particular state. In India public schools are sometimes confused with private schools. However, public schools can be either owned and administered by the government or privately owned. In India there is a lot of difference between private and government schools and public school has nothing to add or contribute in it. A few decades ago, government public schools were considered to be the most important education institutions in the country. These institutions were quite successful to provide the basic amenities, as there used to be a shortage of resources. Today, even though the nation is considered as one of the rapidly developing in the continent, with surplus of resources, the quality of education in government public schools is just deteriorating. Privately owned public schools on the other hand have become the preferred choice, as quality of education has been greatly improved in the last couple of decades. Apart from public schools, there are also community schools, run and administered by specific communities and groups. Indian constitutions guarantees the right to education and that includes religious and other community based education. Community schools are attended by the members of the community and admissions is not given to anyone outside the community. They are self governing and self funded and often run by small trusts.